- Jim Halpert: Is there a birthday that you remember that you loved?
- Dwight Schrute: Here's one: it was dark, warm, wet. A sudden burst of light, an intense pressure like I'd never felt before, father dressed in white, pulls me forward, mother bites the cord--
- Jim Halpert: Ok stop. Forever stop that story. That's disgusting. And it doesn't count. So give me another one.
- Dwight Schrute: Schrutes don't celebrate birthdays, idiot. It started as a depression-era practicality and then, moved on to an awesome tradition that I look forward to every year! What about you?
- Jim Halpert: Ok, when I was seven my dad took me to the Natural History Museum in New York. And we looked at fossils all day. At the end of the day he got me a little, plastic triceratops. It was awesome.
- Dwight Schrute: That's cool. Hey, you know what's even cooler than triceratops? Every other dinosaur that ever existed!
- Jim Halpert: Didn't see that one coming.
Lockerz is pretty fantastic. New music, shows and games. You have the ability to earn points and get free things (ie: MacBooks, iPods, concert tickets and more). If you’re interested, let me know and I’ll invite you.
Are you interested?
1. When I was 9 years old, my brother and I got into a bike race home. After getting a decent lead on him, he decided to swerve in my way and stop me. The race ended with my face meeting the pavement and two brand new front teeth the next day.
2. Sometimes, when I’m alone, I pretend I’m Judy Garland.
3. I went through a two year phase of wearing pigtails…in high school.
4. As a young girl, I was deathly allergic to cats. My throat would swell up if I was near one. As time progressed, my allergy lessened and my hatred grew.
5. My mother went to prison just a few months after my fourth birthday. I was a pretty well-adjusted child all things considered. I’m really open about those things.
6. I was vegetarian for just over three years until 2007. BACON IS LIFE.
7. On occasion, I like to take pictures of people while they sleep on the bus. I have an album to prove it.
8. Despite my love for all things Star Wars, I’ve only seen one of the movies. I think my love comes from watching Ewoks: The Battle for Endor repeatedly as a child.
9. Today I drank my first Coca Cola in over 5 years. It’s disgusting.
10. I can flare my nostrils at an incredible speed. It freaks people out.
11. My feet are uncomfortably flat. It requires all sorts of mind control to keep from crying when standing for long periods of time. Usually I just give up and sit down somewhere.
12. Much to the disapproval of my roommate, I unintentionally make a song out of everyday chores and errands. “I’m making some pasta, I gotta go fast-a. Deee do do duuuum”.
13. My heritage is pretty simple. White lady + Mexican guy = mixed baby with dark hair and freckles.
14. The lovely list of allergies continues with avocados and bananas. Both are very mild but equally unpleasant. Alas, guacamole is worth the itchy throat and wheezing. AMIRITE?
15. When I was 16 I pierced my own lip with a safety pin. Worst idea ever. After having a swollen lip for a few days, I managed to replace the pin with a piece of metal from a spiral notebook. Needless to say, my “lip ring” spawned a large amount of stares and threats of being suspended from school.
16. I have a tendency to meet people at concerts and befriended them right away. I’ve gotten so good at it that I’ve had a friend come visit from Oklahoma, I’ve stayed at another’s dorm and managed to get an “I love you so much” from a tipsy Latina. I rule.
17. My best friends and I were in a band the better part of our junior and senior year. The name of the band was Stealing Wenzzzday and we played kooky, comedic pop/punk. Our yearbook even featured us on a two-page spread. We still have a website.
18. I like going to concerts alone.
19. It’s difficult for me to fall asleep without the sound of a fan present. Last weekend it took me a few hours to fall asleep because the silence was too uncomfortable.
20. I was suspended in 12th grade for going into the guys’ locker room and watching my friends shower with their clothes on. Totally worth it.
21. I’ve beat Tetris on my phone 5 times now. And each time it feels just as sweet.
Featured below is a picture which combines 3, 15 and 17. Enjoy!